8. Is intelligence important?
Just how important is your intelligence to being successful? The answer might surprise you.
As I was growing up my parents put a premium on education. They told me the more education I had the better my chances for success. My dad especially encouraged me to take more math courses. The funny thing is that both my parents had a tenth-grade education.
For some reason, the more college and hard science classes one took, and the better the university one attended, the more one was assumed to be intelligent. Having done well in high school, being accepted into a prestigious university, and winning a four-year ROTC scholarship I thought I was fairly intelligent…that was until I arrived at college and met real, intelligent students.
The point I am trying to make is that most of us assume that our success depends on our intelligence. I have since learned that is only partially true.
The two kinds of intelligence
IQ
Until recently I was only aware of one kind of intelligence, the kind measured by an IQ test. IQ stands for Intelligence Quotient. The average IQ of Americans today is about 95. It is supposed to measure one's ability to learn, an ability one is born with and cannot be improved. I don’t recall ever taking an IQ test in school, and neither do any of my friends or acquaintances.
However, I recall taking a test to become an officer in the Marine Corps. The GT part of the test was used by the military as a measure of intelligence, being fairly compatible with an IQ test. The GT score for every officer was part of their record book, and every Commanding Officer could readily see the GT of their staff. A GT of 100 was considered average, and during World War Two the minimum GT to be accepted as an officer in the Marine Corps was 120. I think it has been lowered since then.
If you go online, you'll see ads talking about the IQ of one celebrity compared to another. How they discover the IQs of these people is a mystery. Clearly, they infer that a higher IQ means being smarter and more successful. But is that true? According to Doctors Bradberry and Greaves, international best-selling Authors of The Emotional Intelligence Appraisal, and the authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0, those with high IQs only outperform people with average IQs only 20% of the time. That begs the question of whether there is another measure of intelligence we should be paying attention to.
EI
A new trend has been taking shape since the 1990s called Emotional Intelligence (EI), and the measure of EI is known as one's Emotional Quotient (EQ).
Google AI says that Emotional intelligence is “the ability to understand, manage, and use your own emotions in a positive way. It also involves understanding the emotions of others. EI can help you communicate effectively, relieve stress, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict.”
The proponents of Emotional Intelligence say that there are four factors comprising one's EQ;
Self-Awareness, Social-Awareness, Self-Management, and Relationship Management. These four skills are responsible for 58% of your performance. Of these, Self-Awareness has the greatest impact on one’s success.
Unlike IQ, which is what it is, and cannot be improved, one’s EQ score can be increased with training. Increasing your ability to recognize and understand your thoughts, feelings, and emotions (Self-Awareness) can help you build trust, maintain strong relationships, and improve communication. All of these are keys to increasing your chances of becoming successful. According to Emotional Intelligence 2.0, research shows that your EQ is “the single biggest predictor of performance in the workplace and the strongest driver of leadership and personal excellence.” It goes on to show that a higher EQ also has a direct correlation with making more money. There is no such correlation with IQ.
How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence
Since improving your EQ, and not your IQ, has an impact on your success it might be a good idea to get an understanding of how you can up your EQ score. In fact, the two PhD authors suggest that the purpose of their book is to help people increase their EQ scores. That is why I would like to focus on the greatest contributing factor in increasing your EQ, which is your self-awareness.
Most people have no idea who they really are, what they really want, or why God created them. They do not realize they have a God-Given GIFT that has been given to them by their Father to make an abundantly successful life possible.
When the Pharisees asked Jesus what the greatest commandment was His reply was to boil down the 619 laws given by Moses to just two.
Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 The second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’.
Matthew 22:37-39
Loving your neighbor as yourself starts with loving yourself.
You cannot give what you do not have.
If you don’t love yourself (self-awareness) it will not be possible to love others.
Later in His ministry, Jesus went even further in reducing His commandments.
“I give you a new commandment—to love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. Everyone will know by this that you are my disciples—if you have love for one another.”
John 13:34-35
Again, it is not possible to love others until you know how much your Father loves you. That is where all your confidence and trust come from. But how do you do that?
Most books I have read about Emotional Intelligence and finding your purpose do a great job of describing the issues. Where they fall short, in my opinion, are actual, tangible solutions. So, here are some steps I recommend that will give you a much higher degree of self-awareness.
1. Examine areas where your relationship (or lack of relationship) with your father has impacted your identity. It may surprise you, but you get your identity from your father, and this could be the very thing that has been holding you back. I call this a Father Fracture, and it is well worth the effort to investigate.
2. Determine the natural way you are pre-wired to behave. This involves taking a personality assessment. As some of the assessment providers say, “Why guess when you can know?” All assessments are not the same, so I recommend using this link for an inexpensive and accurate assessment.
3. Determine the incredibly unique way you think. Even though they call it a strengths assessment, the Gallup organization’s Clifton Strengths Assessment is the most accurate description of your unique thinking process. It is so unique, that this assessment is a phenomenal guide to discovering your GIFT.
4. See how these two assessments combine to give you an accurate description of who you really are. They are the major factors in finding your purpose, which put simply, is to Employ Your Gift.
If you explore the links in these four simple steps you will find a tangible way to find and improve your self-awareness and Emotional Intelligence. When you do, your ability to love others will become effortless.
Questions for discussion groups
1. How important has IQ been in your life?
2. Have you heard of EQ and its effects on success?
3. What have you done in the past to try to increase your self-awareness?
4. How do you think loving yourself will impact your ability to love others?
5. Since all these questions relate directly to Personal Development, how do you think a faith-based approach to Personal Development might help you and your loved ones?